3 Days in Paradise (Island, that is)

I doubt that there are too many things more pleasing for tired eyes to see than the heavenly aqua blue waters that surround the 700 tiny islands that are the Bahamas. As the captain instructed the flight attendants to prepare for landing, I raised the shade on my window to witness this spectacular display of chromatic brilliance, this rhapsody in blue.

Breathtaking comes to mind, but still might not fully encompass the magnitude of the vision. My stomach got the same butterflies that I felt each time I saw that "most beautiful girl I've ever seen" when I was 14 or maybe that was the captain adjusting the altitude for turbulence. It's almost magical, like that feeling you get as a six-year-old when the electric light parade starts on Main Street at Disneyland.

Some say these waters have healing powers. The crick in my neck from being wedged between the headrest and window seemed to be improving with each passing second and not even my pinkie toe had touched the pristine, bone-white sand yet. Remember when you wanted to help your mom bake the cake and she, fearing total decimation of the whole dessert project, put you in charge of sifting the flour (something that you can't really mess up) and you marveled at how the sifted flour was so fine and you wanted to put your hands in it and play but she realized it just in time and snatched it back so that you'd actually have cake to enjoy? The sand was like that, a crisp white shirt fresh from the dry cleaners that sets a nice backdrop for the silky aqua-blue tie that is the Caribbean Sea. When the water hits the shore, like the Revolution--according to Bunny Wailer, you feel no pain.

I was treated to a mild, friendly Sun. It was no more than 85 degrees the whole time I was there, a gentle breeze tickled the skin making it oh so comfortable to be out and about. And out and about I did go! If you've been paying attention, you know that out and about seldom are far from a hearty plate and amazing sights. Daylight was wasting away and I had a date with exquisite locale number 1: The One and Only Ocean Club.

Wow! So powerful, so profound and all encompassing, and yet only three letters, this word. The shuttle driver stopped in a turnabout at the Ocean Club's golf course and I was awestruck. Walking through a courtyard and past the pro shop the magnificent blue coupled with the Augusta National quality manicured fairway just below me was so spectacular it almost made noise. It’s as if the rest of your life your eyes have been watching regular TV, and then you get here and LIFE is in HD. Even one of my 5 hour, triple bogey-laden rounds would be exciting here. I’d probably not care much if I lost a ball or if I even hit the ball. But what should I expect from a place that is run by One and Only Resorts, which has properties in some of my most desired wish-list “M” locations (Maldives and Mauritius). Everything here was truly first class. I was glad to have a reason to be on the grounds as a family friend had a residence here. Only in Nassau for 2 hours now and it’s already better than my previous visit. Back in 2004 I came on a Carnival Cruise line and spent a day here. I did quite a bit in that day, but it was just too rushed. For my money, getting to your destination and checking it out thoroughly for a few days is much better than wasting days on a boat and watching it knife its way through the sea.

One thing that I have still yet to do is partake in a local night spot. I daresay that if the folks at the nightlife spots are 1/5 as lively as the ones that I sat and watched football with on my first day, then a good time will surely be had by all. It never occurred to me that people in another country would be tuned in and quite die hard about their allegiances with teams like the Cleveland Browns and New York Jets. I don’t think I’ve EVER met a real live New York Jets fan, at least not one that’s younger than 60 years old . This was one of those trips where a relative told you to “call so and so,” when you get there and you actually do and it ends up being real cool. I was fed quite extensively, and whisked away to a comfortable seat in front of the television to watch Tom Brady’s Patriots dispense of the Steelers while on the other TV, the Jets fans barked out orders as if the quarterback could hear them. It was nuts. There’s a festival called Junkanoo that happens the day after Christmas and also New Year’s Day. This looks like the party to end all parties, so schedule accordingly if you’re able. They were setting up the grandstands a full 2 weeks in advance and the cab drivers and all other locals I encountered were all abuzz about it.

On my second day, I got down to the business of eating as you knew I was bound to do sooner than later. One thing I did manage to do the last thing I was here was get to some of the good local spots where the locals actually go, in Double D’s and The Fish Fry. Double D’s is along Bay Road near the bridge that takes you to Paradise Island. It’s your basic greasy spoon, but when the spoon is stirring up Caribbean food, you’re in for a special treat, and they make a great drink. You can get a good Bahama Mama at most places in Nassau, but especially here. Also, make sure you try at least one Goombay Smash while you’re here, for pure rum goodness!

The Fish Fry on Arawak Cay, just beyond the tourist trap that is the Central part of town along Bay Street, is THE spot. If you time it right, you’ll see what I’m talking about. This is where folks go when they get off work. Come by around 4 or 5pm for some real local flavor. I think I ate at Twin Brothers last time I was here, and this time it was Oh Andros! The favorite at most places in town and especially here is the Conch Salad and Conch Fritters. Conch is the mollusk that resides in that marvelous shell that you always see on television with the guy standing on a big rock and blowing into it with the sun setting behind him. The Conch Salad and Crab Salads are terribly fresh and usually made right there in front of you, at a separate window, since their demand is so high.
The Conch Fritters go great with the remoulade dipping sauce they provide, and a Bahamian Iced Tea or the requisite Bahama Mama. Come hungry, because you will get plenty to eat. I made the mistake of getting my entrée plate of boiled snapper, rice and peas, plantains, and conch fritters and thinking that my crab salad was going to be a small side salad. It wasn’t! It was a meal within itself. I couldn’t nearly finish it, but tried to put forth my best effort. It’s a good thing that there was a nice stretch of beach nearby to walk some of that food off before folding myself into a taxi.

Even the taxi rides are an experience. The drivers are so friendly and quite a bit more casual than cabbies you’ll see in other places. The guy driving on the way back from the Fish Fry was going on and on about his costume for Junkanoo and then suddenly pulled over to pick up a lady friend of his who rode with us the rest of the way. It was hilarious. If you don’t want to take a taxi everywhere, those going to or from Paradise Island can take the ferry. As with the taxis, the ferry rides have entertainment of their own. Tour guides like Clarence or Motley provide you with a historical perspective of the sites visible from the Bay, complete with gossip about stars and locations of their humble (and not so humble) abodes. Throwing these guys a dollar or two at the end of the ride is more than worth it, as they work on tips and add spice and humor to the 10 minute ride.

I stayed at the Atlantis Resort which, I must admit, is one of the most spectacular hotel resort property’s that you’ll find anywhere. The place is beautifully kept and its friendly staff are more than willing to do their best to make your stay as enjoyable as possible. This quality costs though. Unless you’ve got money to burn, I’d avoid doing too much casual eating on the property. There are a few little restaurants right outside the doors of Atlantis that make a decent meal and at a much more reasonable price. Anthony’s Grille and Bar is such a place. I had breakfast at Anthony’s twice and was very pleased with the quality of the food as well as the décor and the service.
For overall appeal, though, you can’t really knock Atlantis. It’s got a little something for everyone, with full service Spa, exercise facilities, several swimming pools and bars, and restaurants. The Bahamian Club is supposed to be a very upscale restaurant recommended to me by several locals as one of their favorite “special occasion” spots. Unfortunately, it was closed on the night I thought about going. It was low season, so they shut down parts of the resort on certain days. The place is so big and complete though, that you hardly feel cheated. For the high rollers among you, check out the Cove, the newest hotel wing opened. It is decidedly more upscale than the other hotel areas and has some of the swankiest looking bars (Seaglass) and restaurants (Bobby Flay’s Mesa Grill) in the whole resort. It looks like a place where P-Diddy might film a video. The beach behind the Cove somehow seems even nicer than the rest, its sand slightly less trodden upon perhaps.

On my last full day, after I had worked up a pretty serious appetite shopping for souvenirs, I stumbled upon another rare find in Brother Eddie’s Bahamian Kitchen. Well down Bay Street (at Elizabeth) and out of the tourist strip, my nose for local fare must’ve led the way. It didn’t look like much, but again, I saw the locals crossing the street to get there in the distance, so I went in too. Curry goat, rice and peas, salad and plantains hit the spot this time. The thing I love about this and so many of the other places is that it always tastes like somebody’s mama is cookin’ for ya. Another very storied place that I’ve failed to make it to during my two visits is the Poop Deck, also in the vicinity of Double D’s. It comes highly regarded, so I will surely make it my first stop on the next visit.

With one night left, some upscale dining was in order. Chez Willie bills itself as the “Finest in French and Bahamian Cuisine”. Another highly regarded establishment, I had seen it several times going to and fro on both trips. Unfortunately, I have to give Willie a B- for this visit, as they were out of many things. Well, let me ease up for a moment. I partly blame myself for going late on a Tuesday night, not exactly a busy time. I suspect that most of the kitchen staff had gone home. My waiter was excellent however, recommending a nice Pinot Blanc and pointing out some of the high points of the limited menu. After dinner he even had me autograph the bottle and placed it on a shelf with others in the very cozy sitting room just off the bar. He made me realize just how crucial a knowledgeable and courteous wait staff can be to the success of a restaurant. Without his friendliness and candor, I think I’m way more upset that they couldn’t make the Guava Duff that I wanted for dessert. Guava Duff in the Bahamas is like Apple Pie or Chocolate Cake in the States, so make sure you try some. It would’ve been nice to end my trip on that note, but the waiter informed me that with the main chef already gone for the evening, he didn’t want to attempt it and risk serving me a subpar product. I can respect that. It gives me yet another thing to come back for in Paradise.